The magic happens within you. Become what you want to be.

This post is a part of #UseYourAnd activity at BlogAdda in association with Gillette Venus.

We women are strange. Gullible yet so strong! Daily, we balance the lives of people around us as well as our own, juggling the various balls of duties, playing various roles. We are made to believe that it’s a woman’s job, to look beautiful, to take care of others, to nourish the family, to sacrifice our needs and happiness for others. We are made to believe that we can’t have it all. We can either have a successful career OR a blissful family life.  We can either be a homemaker OR a single lady who lives on her own terms. Society never shirks from putting a label of either this or that. ‘Oh, she is just a housewife! Oh, she is a corporate climber who has no time for family. Oh, she is not a marriage material, she doesn’t know to cook!  Oh, she is not fit for a senior position; she has a toddler to attend. So forth and so on. We face this labeling every now and then. These ideas are drilled into our mind so strongly that we stop questioning the discrimination, the inequality and injustice and start to accept it as normal.

As a student, once I went to see my college professor who asked me, “What does Parimita mean?” (Bengali names can be little intriguing at times. And Parimita is not same as Paromita for the record.) I answered like a bright student, “Sir, it comes from the word Parimit in Devnagri lipi (Hindi) which means limit.”  Professor chuckled, “My son’s name is Aseem which means limitless. Why would your parent’s want to name you Parimita which means limit. Doesn’t it sound negative?” I was caught unaware, and a little embarrassed. Someone just pointed out a negative in my name which has been my identity for years. And I just didn’t know how to react. I couldn’t think of anything else but to answer, “Sir, because I am a girl.”

Now I look back at the young me in college and think who got this idea in my head. I wonder how I could say that because I am a girl, I should be in limits. And then I realized it’s the social conditioning which we women go through in every part of the world since the time we are born. “Don’t play with guns instead pay with a doll. Girls don’t ride a bike. Come home before dark. Learn to cook and clean, it will help once you marry.” These ideas are completely installed in our systems by the time we hit adulthood. We ourselves label us inferior. We ourselves limit our growth. We ourselves believe that we can have either this OR that. We feel guilt if we don’t fit into the roles specified by the society of a dutiful daughter, a responsible mother, a loving wife, a sincere follower in the corporate structure.  Why can’t we be who we want to be? Why can’t we lead the pack? Why can’t we show the world that we are capable of anything and everything?

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After a few years in college, I decided to explore all my interests. As and when I found time and opportunity I became what I wanted to be. I tried my hand at whatever seemed possible. Of course, it couldn’t have been possible without my husband’s support and my own strong desire to be what I wanted to be. I questioned myself year after year, why should I limit myself? Why can’t I do what all I want to do? And that kept me going.

I had loved sketching and painting since school times. I used to win Camlin color contest and several other internal art competitions. But I never got a chance to get a formal training in art. After we moved to UK for few years where I was freelancing, I discovered I had lots of free time and the right resources to learn art.  I started painting on Canvas in 2007. And discovered I could create good (if not great) art on canvas. Those paintings still adorn my wall. So I became a PAINTER.

I came back to India in 2009 and started discovering opportunities in print media. I always wanted to write for mainstream magazines and websites. Luckily, I got a break as a features writer and started writing about fashion and beauty on Femina.in, Bebeautiful.in, HAIR and many other portals. I also got a chance to publish my own book, ‘Look Stunning At Any Size’, a style guide for everyday woman in 2012. So I became FEATURES/ CONTENT WRITER and an AUTHOR.

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I fought Endometriosis (a gynae condition) for a very long time but eventually became a MOTHER to a gorgeous baby girl in 2012 itself. I can’t thank god enough for that.

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And, also started blogging at Mumbaigloss.in which made me a BLOGGER. Apart from this I also play other roles successfully (wife, daughter, etc.)

Somewhere my older self is happy as it has realized that I can avail many opportunities. I have many options and I shouldn’t limit or restrict myself. I am happy that the notion of being in limit as a girl is being broken. Now I can happily tell my professor that though I am called Parimita but I have limitless potential. I can be what I want to be. I am a painter AND a writer AND an author AND a blogger AND a mother. Also, I am handling my corporate role successfully as a Corp Comm professional with an IT giant.

Sometimes, I feel overwhelmed with all that I do but then I am happy with what all I could achieve. I am hopeful that I will be able to achieve much more in the future.  It is all about using the power of #UseYourAnd. This power is liberating and fulfilling. It doesn’t matter what you want to be. What matters is how and when.

 

About MumbaiGloss

Parimita Chakravorty is an author, blogger, features writer and a communications specialist. She has written for various popular magazines and websites related to beauty, fashion, jewellery and lifestyle, including HAIR India, Femina.in, BeBeautiful.in, Hello, etc. She has also contributed to various youth blogs and magazines. Her book ‘Look Stunning At Any Size’ has been well appreciated and received by the readers. Currently, she is part of India’s leading IT brand and takes care of their internal communications. Parimita is also working towards bringing awareness about Endometriosis in India; a silent epidemic which is consuming a lot of lives. She manages a page ‘Endometriosis India Files’ where patients discuss their condition and diagnosis.
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